Me: Hey, Old Navy, why do your pants fit so weird?
Old Navy: Why do you keep buying my pants if all you do is complain about them, you cheapskate!
Me: Well, wait a minute...
ON: Have you ever thought maybe it's YOU? You're not exactly 100% faithful to your little Points Plan, you know..
Me: Hey hey HEY!
ON: Sorry. I'm sorry, it's just...it's been hard. I mean, when Banana Republic is your big sister, it's like nothing you do is good enough.
Me: I hear you. But you know, she's a stuck-up bitch. You're much more approachable.
ON: <blushes> Thanks, but I mean...well, she's good at what she does.
Me: Really, I only buy her stuff second-hand or on serious clearance. Most of the new stuff is overpriced and fugly anyway. You go on the site and everything's beige!
ON: Ha! She does love her neutrals. Look, being the youngest, it's like my parent company just gave up on me. They're always like "You're the fun one! We don't have to worry about fit or shape! Just make the colors brighter! You know we need you to be the cheap one!"
Me: Man. That sucks.
ON: You think I don't want to do a collaboration? Did they even THINK about sending Diane Von Furstenberg my way? Oh nooo, that's just for the Gap. Her demographic is SO much more sophisticated. I can be sophisticated!
Me: Sure you can! I have a necklace of yours that I get tons of compliments on! And everyone's surprised when I told them I got it at Old Navy! I mean...not that there's anything wrong with...um...
ON: It's okay. I understand.
Me: Sorry. So, can we talk about the pants?
ON: <Sigh> Sure. Go ahead.
Me: Well, it's like, I try one size on, and they're too tight. I try the next size up, and they're a little too big. And after a couple hours of wearing them, it's like they're three sizes too big! What's up with that?
ON: I know. Believe me, I've heard it a million times. I don't know what to tell you. Hey, we have some cute swimwear on sale. Have you checked it out?
Me: Ah...yeah...your swimsuits aren't really made for a grown woman who's had a kid. They don't offer enough...support, if you know what I mean.
ON: Oh.
Me: Yeah. But you know what I DO love? Your athletic wear! It's really well done, and so reasonably priced!
ON: <beams> Aww, thanks! Wow, that's great. I mean, I really feel better now.
Me: It's true! Okay. No more complaints about the pants. I can deal. I mean, I find J Crew pretty cheap on eBay, so I'll just-
ON: Hello? I don't want to hear about it.
Me: Right. Okay. Active wear!
ON: Right. Bye.
The Bellesphere
Triumphs and trials of the world's oldest living 14-year-old girl.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Friday, August 26, 2011
Quick Swatches: Revlon Starry Pink and Facets of Fuchsia
I"m currently in the middle of moving and preparing for a hurricane (!!!), but I managed to get my hands on two of Revlon's Fall 2011 colors: Facets of Fuchsia and Starry Pink. I saw them on Eva Chen's tumblr a few months ago and was instantly smitten. When Steph said she found them at Target in the regular Revlon stock, I made sure to check my locals as soon as I could.
Starry Pink. A pale powder pink with silver micro and hexagon glitter. I think this is lovely for fall. I can see it working really well with dark grays, black and deep berry shades in your wardrobe.
Facets of Fuchsia. A sheer black jelly with deep fuchsia micro and hexagon glitter. This is really stunning. None of my photos could capture it.
This is three coats of each, no topcoat. This collection also has a blue glitter, I think called Blue Mosaic, and a grayish taupe called Smoky Canvas, which I really like but didn't get because I have so many grays and taupes. I might cave later, though.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Holiday
I'm going to the beach with one of my favorite vintage bags and Essie Turquoise & Caicos.
I'm going to take it as easy as I can. See you soon!
Friday, July 22, 2011
Casual Friday
Today is a rare "Casual Friday" at work, in honor of the heatwave. Our casual days are few, far between and fraught with drama re: what's appropriate.
So I just wore a skirt, tank top and cardigan. I love these sandals but they're wearing out. They probably have one more summer left in them.
Things I Haven't Accomplished Lately, Summer Edition:
So I just wore a skirt, tank top and cardigan. I love these sandals but they're wearing out. They probably have one more summer left in them.
Things I Haven't Accomplished Lately, Summer Edition:
- Running a 5K this weekend. Too hot! No way. Plus I haven't been training. I blame my coach, a skinny millennial who overuses the word "bitch" and was inconveniently out of the country for a couple weeks on personal business. Like I'm supposed to run while she's gallivanting around Scotland? She's never even heard of Camera Obscura!
- Getting through the stack of books on my bedside table. It keeps growing. I just got a new parenting book and "No one belongs here more than you" by Miranda July. Am currently working my way through "Women, Food and God."
- Doing a decent mani. I painted my toenails for our family vacation but since then it's been a bust! My poor nails. Maybe tonight.
- Updating my blog. I know! I have a few drafts in the works. Miss me?
No makeup today. Take that, world!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Winning!
First, let's talk polish. Continuing with my Revlon fixation as of late, today I have Revlon Top Speed in Royal on my toes:
I really like it. It performed better than the two other Top Speeds I've tried in the past couple weeks: Electric (so chalky and terrible I took it right off) and Mock Snob (which looked fine after three coats but was a nightmare to apply). This is just one coat of Royal; if it had been my fingernails I would have done two. It dried flat so I added Seche Vite.
In non-polish news, I won something! And a really great something! These lovely earrings from etsy seller Contempo Jewels:
I won them by entering a drawing on StyleLush. If you haven't visited StyleLush, I highly recommend it. It's full of great finds in nearly every area - beauty, home, kid stuff, places to go - oh, and gifts! I've gotten so many great gift ideas from it! And its sister site, FoodLush, is also a great idea generator. Anyway, I was so excited when I saw my name in the winner announcement post! I never win anything! Can't wait to get these babies on my ears!
In non-polish news, I won something! And a really great something! These lovely earrings from etsy seller Contempo Jewels:
I won them by entering a drawing on StyleLush. If you haven't visited StyleLush, I highly recommend it. It's full of great finds in nearly every area - beauty, home, kid stuff, places to go - oh, and gifts! I've gotten so many great gift ideas from it! And its sister site, FoodLush, is also a great idea generator. Anyway, I was so excited when I saw my name in the winner announcement post! I never win anything! Can't wait to get these babies on my ears!
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Revlon Just Tinted
I'm not sure where I first heard about Revlon's Limited Edition Just Tinted nail polishes...it was probably this post on Nouveau Cheap. The idea of a sheer matte polish really appealed to me; it sounded novel and summery. I looked and LOOKED for these for weeks with no luck. I finally found them at the Rite-Aid near my house, which gets lots of limited edition displays. I've had really good luck finding LE polishes there, so I wasn't surprised when they finally turned up. Of course I saw them at Ulta a few days later, but that's usually how it goes.
I picked up three of the four shades:
I picked up three of the four shades:
Victorian, Desire, Dawn
I swatched all three as soon as I got home.
Dawn, Desire, Victorian
This is two coats each. Application is a challenge with these; the sheer/matte combo is like watercolor paint. If you're not careful, it looks like when you were little and you colored your nails with markers. So it takes practice to get the coats even. I didn't use a base coat because I thought it might affect the finish.
Speaking of finish, the display also had a gloss topcoat in it, but I was skeptical that it was any different than a regular topcoat so I skipped it. My first full mani was Desire:
This Instagram shot doesn't really capture the sheerness. Of course the matte finish means that you get quick tipwear, but I don't mind because I really like the look of the polish.
Next I tried Dawn, a subtle coral:
I used Seche Vite over this to achieve a glossy finish and I really loved the way it looked. Very jelly-like and soft.
I love these tints and I might go back for the fourth shade; it was a berry/purple. Nice work, Revlon! I feel like I've been on a Revlon/Essie kick lately when it comes to drugstore buys. I just got in an order from Zoya too, so I'll be swatching that soon. I'm going to do my best to get as many fun summer colors in as I can this year! Bright beauties improve my mood.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
All of the Things I Was On the Inside
Do you ever feel like you left yourself behind somewhere?
I wish I was braver.
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