Things I Accomplished This Week

1. Downloaded Tetris to my phone and henceforth stopped paying attention to reality.
2. Became the owner of a bright red "vintage" (called vintage because that's the only word for "used" on etsy) Coach drawstring bucket backpack thanks to some surprise Christmas money (thanks, Mom!). I'm looking forward to "accidentally" hitting unsuspecting strangers with it when I toss it back onto my shoulder.
3. Ordered FOUR pairs of the same pants from Old Navy in four different sizes. Will return three. This means my tush size is fluctuating at an alarming rate.
4. Fantasized about exercising, detoxing, going vegan (see number 3 above).
5. Had a kick-ass Christmas with my wonderful family!
6. Ordered more sample eyeglass frames. None of the first five made the cut.
7. Made Martha Stewart's macaroni and cheese and felt my life shorten a little while eating it.